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The Toast Burner of Doom/Transcript
This is the transcript for "The Toast Burner of Doom". Script *(NH is looking at his billboard of failed plans.) *'NH': I may have failed at my plans 1,251 times, but I have a feeling this plan won't fail. What I need is a type of device to give me the ability to read other's minds, and then I'll be unstoppable! (NH laughs maniacally, and then coughs.) Hm, I need some help to build the machine. But who? Ah, yes, my servant. *(Cut to NH walking in the woods.) *'NH': Servant! I need you! *(Rig comes out of bush.) *'Rig': Yeeeeeeees? *'NH': I need you to help me build my evil superweapon of DOOM. *'Rig': Okie dokie. Just let me finish flying with the squirrels! *'NH': What?! How many times do I have to tell you?! The squirrels are our enemy! *'Rig': I thought the mayor was our enemy. *'NH': The squirrels are a different enemy. A squirrely enemy......of squirrels. Now come! *'Rig': Aw, I gotta go squirrels, see you later! *(NH and Rig leave the woods and head inside Rack's house.) *'Rig': So, what is it? A toaster? *'NH': No Rig. How can I rule the world with a toaster? *'Rig': I dunno. You could be the ruler of bread. *'NH': I don't want to! *'Rig': When it's done, can we put toast in it?! *'NH': Absolutely not! *'Rig': But it's a toaster! *'NH': No, it-. Wait a minute. Yes, yes it is. *'Rig': Yay! *(Rig moves around on the floor.) *'NH': (facepalm): I need an aspirin. *(A montage plays of the two building the machine.) *'NH': Well, it's finished, so let's not let science wait. *'Rig': Okie dokie. Just let me lick this snow cone. *(10 minutes later.) *'NH': Are you almost done? *'Rig': Yep. *(30 minutes later.) *'NH': Rig! Push the button! Now! *'Rig': The huh? *'NH': The button of the machine. *'Rig': What machine? *'NH': Why did I pick you as my servant? *'Rig': Dunno. But look at my tongue! *(Rig shows her tongue, which is blue.) *'NH': Yes, yes, that's brilliant, but just press the button! *'Rig': Okie dokie. *(Rig goes by the button on the machine.) *'Rig': Ooh, is that the hole? *(Rig puts bread in the hole.) *'Rig': Yay! Make me a toastie! *(Rig pushes the button. The machine then malfunctions, and explodes.) *'NH': What happened?! Why do I not feel any different?! *'Rig': Well, I gotta go fly with the squirrels, K? *(Rig leaves.) *'NH': That imbecile must've ruined the machine somehow. Sigh, time to add it to the list. *(NH adds it to his list of failed plans. Cut to NH in the kitchen.) *'Rack': Ready for breakfast, NH? *'NH': Don't talk to me, human. I detest breakfast. *'Rack': Aw, what's wrong grumpy Gus?! *'NH': You'll see what grumpy is in a minute. *'Rack': Aw, is someone cranky? *'NH': Yes, very. Even more so with you around! *'Rack': Aw, I know something to cheer you up! *'NH': What? *(Rack goes away for a moment and brings out puppets.) *'Rack': A puppet show. *'NH': Yay. What's next? Let's Bury NH Alive? Because I'd find that more pleasant. *(Later....... Rack is in the kitchen, while NH is in the living room.) *'Rack': I'm so glad NH liked the puppet show! *'NH': I hate that human. Treating me like a monkey. *'Rack': (making sandwich): Ah, bread. Soft and white, just the way I like it. Oops, forgot something. *leaves* *'NH': That human makes me so mad I could-. *(Rack's bread suddenly burns.) *'NH': What is this?! *(NH amazingly makes all of the bread in a bag stay in mid air.) *'NH': Do I have a superpower of some kind? *(NH concentrates on a piece of bread and turns it into toast.) *'NH': Yes! Yes! Yeeeeeeeeeeeees! I must use my new ability for evil! I. Am. Super. WOLF! Muhahahahhahahahhahahahhahah! I must use my new ability all over the town! *(NH leaves.) *(NH is outside.) *'NH': I am Super Wolf, hear me howl! (Howls) *'Rack': Why is my bread burnt? Hm, maybe I should go to US about this. *(Rack heads down to US's office.) *'US': Oh, good, is my butt comforter here yet?! I need my butt comfy. *'Rack': Um, no. It's me, Rack. *'US': Raclk! Why are you here? *'Rack': Look at what happened to my bread. *Holds up a piece of toast* *'US': What is this amazing creation? Crispy, blackened bread? I shall call you......toast! I just invented a new food! *'Rack': Uh, toast already exists. *'US': What do you mean?! Who stole my wonderful idea?! *'Rack': Anyways....... *'US': No, not anyways! I must find who stole my brilliant idea! *'Rack': But US-. Meh. *(Rack leaves.) *(US goes in her closet.) *'US'(Voice only): No one steals my ideas and gets away with it! *(US gets out wearing a ball gown.) *'Dep Mayor': Why are you wearing a ball gown? *'US': Well, I need to look my best when I pwn. *'Dep Mayor': Huh? *'US': Doesn't matter. Anyway, get me some juice and noodles at the store as my victory dinner. *'Dep Mayor': Why? *'US': 'Cause I want you to. *'Dep Mayor': What if I don't want to? *'US': If you don't go to the store, and pick me up juice and noodles, I will shoot you in the knee. *'Dep Mayor': Well, I do like my kneecaps........... *'US': Here's a little tip: Don't mess with me. If you do, say goodbye to something you love. *'Dep Mayor': Yes sir-ma'am! *'US': That's more like it! Get me a butt comforter too! See ya later! *(US leaves.) *(Meanwhile, NH is terrorizing the town.) *'NH': Hahahahahhahahahha! Enjoy your burnt sammich! *'US': Hey! *'NH': Ugh, US, what are you doing here?! *'US': I'd like to ask you the same question. Why did you steal my idea?! *'NH': Huh? *'US': Don't you 'huh" me! Do you know who you're talking to?! *'NH': Someone insane. *'US': Alright, that's it! Dance battle! Now! *'NH': Huh? *'US': (Dances): I'm doing better than you! *'NH': (Shrugs): Time to burn more sammiches! *'US'(Dancing): You should just give up! You're talking to the 10 time Dance Champion of the World! *(NH, ignoring US, is turning all the bread in town into toast.) *'US': (Dancing, grabbing out butter): I know something that'll make him slip! Good thing I always keep butter in my pocket! *(US throws the butter.) *'NH': Yes, enjoy your burnt sammich too! (The butter gets in his eyes) Ah, my weakness! My eyes! My beautiful eyes! My beautiful, precious eyes! They burn! *'US': Ha, I knew I'd win! *'Dep Mayor': (Unenthusiastic): Here's your victory dinner. *'US': Yes! (Eats/Drinks it all immediately) *'Dep Mayor': Time for your nap. *'US': Aw, just a few more minutes! *'Dep Mayor': Nope. *'US': Fine. *(US and Dep Mayor leave.) *'NH': No! My power! Gone! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! *(Rig pops up eating a snow cone.) *'Rig': Wanna snow cone? It has manure in it! *'NH': I'll pass. But, Super Wolf will return AGAIN! YOU WILL SEE! YOU'LL ALL SEE! *'Rig': C'mon, you know you want it! *'NH': Rig, don't ruin my dramatic moments! *'THE END'. Category:Transcripts